Falling in love is the easiest thing in world but, sadly, healing a broken heart and moving on from a failed relationship is often considerably more difficult. We have all been there. When a relationship ends, it can be incredibly difficult to get over the pain and rejection. It is essentially a grieving process: not only are you saying goodbye to someone you love, but you are also saying goodbye to all your hopes and dreams, which is why some people take a long time to recover and, in some cases, never manage it. So if this sounds like you, read on for some useful tips on how to get out of love and move on with your life.
The first thing to remember is that the relationship has ended for a reason. Whilst you might have thought the relationship was a match made in heaven, clearly something was not working for it to have died a death. But fear not, although you might feel utterly wretched right now, there are ways you can heal the pain and cut those emotional ties.
How to get out of love with your sanity intact
It is only natural in the weeks following a break-up for your brain to use selective amnesia when thinking about your lost love. Instead of remembering all the times your partner said or did hurtful things, your brain is stuck on an endless loop remembering happy events such as the first time he gave you flowers or told you he “loved you”.
Well in order to kill those loving feelings and move on, sit down and make a list of all the things your partner did that upset or hurt you. It could be a catalog of obvious things such as the time he slept with your best friend and saved the video footage on his mobile phone, or maybe something more trivial such as the time he “forgot” your birthday and went to the footy with his mates instead.
Next on the list is to remove all traces of him from your life. You might find it comforting to sleep with his old tee shirt because it still smells of him, but the time has come to burn it in the garden along with the all the cards, letters, and photographs: it won’t be easy, but this is a vital part of the process of letting go. And it should go without saying that you must delete his number from your mobile phone!
The end of a relationship is a good time for a makeover and spring clean. Instead of falling asleep every night with a bottle of vodka, do something positive and reinvent yourself. Have your hair restyled, buy some new clothes, join the gym, and make an effort to go out and mix with your friends. It will be difficult at first, but sitting at home feeling depressed is not going to help you move on.
And finally, take comfort from the fact that even those who have gone through the most appalling relationship break-ups manage to move on in time. There will probably always be a place in your heart for this person, but life is too short to waste it with someone who does not appreciate what a great person you are!